Wednesday, September 26, 2012

A Word on Invincibility

Spending time in Asia has largely confirmed my belief that the notion of invincibility is of Western creation. There are a million explanations for this, from our aversion to the topic of death to our upbringing relatively void of boundaries (both imposed and created), which I will not go into at this time. That being said, however (at the risk of breaking young hearts and minds), I would like to go on record pointing out that WE ARE NOT INVINCIBLE. We are fragile and made of skin and bones. We are capable of falling and cracking. I do not suggest that anyone live their lives with this idea in the forefront of their minds, but it must be said occasionally for the sake of compassion and quiet urgency, if for no other reason. Allow this notion to intertwine your life with another, not to harbor fear or inspire the life of an introvert.

All of that being said, there is one thing in my life that makes me feel invincible. Every time I feel weakened or at risk of rejection (which, according to Steinbeck, is the root of all anger, crime, guilt and evil), I am eased by the reassurance of my safety net, the network of people I can always fall back on. I have been blessed with the constant support of some of the most strong, inspiring people and they are the ones who make me invincible. It is not my bones or my wallet or even my assiduousness that make me unbreakable, but merely the love coming from others.

Friday, September 14, 2012

They are excessively warm hands.


Photo: James Henkel

I have always been fascinated by peoples' hands. From my mother's long, delicate hands of bone, tendon and gold to my father's large, spatulate palms, which from a youthful perspective appeared battered yet capable. These are the hands that raised me. Hands are action, they are humanity. They build cities and they tear the wings off butterflies. They can tell a person's story or keep the deepest secrets. They wring, writhe, wipe tears and throw punches. At the start of a romance, hands are the conduits of emotion and the tentative explorers of the uncharted territory known as another's body. Hands are power, compassion, kindness and cruelty.

When traveling and meeting new people one of the first things I see is their hands. Are they the hands of a worker, a scholar, an artist, a woman confident and comfortable in her skin, a man who has taken the weight of the world into his palms? Often these first impressions are incorrect, or incomplete, but everyone needs a starting point. I know that I have crossed into a comfortable, familiar territory with another when I find my hands on their arms, hair, bodies without making a conscious decision to do so. They carry heat, they form caverns, they retract in fear. They heal life and they end life. They make friends and lasting relationships and they keep in touch. 

I love hands. I love the fluidity with which they move. I love the feeling of others' hands; what it can mean to feel that. I love to see what people do with them, if they fold them softly in their laps, they crack and bend them with nerves, they charm snakes or they mend a broken arm. They are the ultimate reflection of humanity, of our fragility and our strength. 

They are excessively warm hands,
that continually want to cool
themselves and involuntarily lay
themselves on any cool object, 
outspread, with air between the fingers.
Into those hands the blood could
shoot, as it mounts to a person's
head, and when clenched, 
they were indeed like the heads
of madmen, raging
with fancies.

Ranier Maria Rilke